Saturday, May 27, 2017
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales Spoiler Free Review
An improvement over the original, taking out unnecessary romance and replacing it with a pure search for a mystical artifact that had some romantic tensions here and there, but nothing too forced like the previous one. We kick off with a kid sinking himself to the bottom of the sea, only to come back up with a ship: the Flying Dutchman. We’re reunited with Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) for the first time in a decade, but he’s not happy to see the boy who is in fact, his son Henry. Fast forward nine years, and Henry (Brenton Thwaites) sails the seas with the British, and after being shamed and imprisoned for trying to order the captain around, he’s thrown in jail until Captain Salazar (Javier Bardem) kills everyone except him to send a message, because dead men tell no tales. We’re then reunited with our main protagonist: Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp), as he and his crew rob a bank by taking the vault and building with them on the Colonial equivalent of a car chase. Long story short, the crew abandons him due to a lack of a real ship to be captain of, and he realizes how washed up he is, until Henry rescues him, along with Carina Smyth (Kaya Scodelario), an aspiring astronomer the men accused of being a witch. They then go on the search for the trident of Poseidon, so Henry can end the curse of the Flying Dutchman. These new characters are likable, and while seeming like carbon copies of Will Turner and Elizabeth Swan, Henry (being their actual son) thrusts himself into the pirate’s life while Will wanted to live honorably until he learned the truth of his father. Carina is a modern woman trapped in a time when women couldn’t do squat, like Elizabeth Swan, but she’s not as apologetic as her, and as a result, is sentenced to hanging for “witchcraft.” Put simply: Jack is on his last legs as a pirate and must restore his honor while being hunted by the enemy that made him who he is today, Henry seeks Jack to help find Poseidon’s trident and free his father/Jack’s old friend, and Carina wants to find the trident to do what the diary her father left her had instructions to do. The rest of the crew is really just there, and Captain Salazar proves to be an scary antagonist with strong ties to Jack Sparrow. I’d just like to note it’s really cool how they got his hair to look like it was floating in water when he was on a ship over water, just one of the many amazing visual effects this movie had to offer, from the return of the Queen Anne’s Revenge and the Black Pearl. It all suites the story quite well, and pays off the set-up from On Stranger Tides. Geoff Zenelli takes the reigns from Hans Zimmer for the soundtrack, and provides another epic score: high-octane music with setting-appropriate instruments in sequences like the bank robbery, that slow, casual theme for Jack Sparrow, and slow, eerie music for Salazar. All around, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales tells this rather over-long tale with a nice sense of humor throughout, and proves to be a solid installment in a film series based on a theme park ride.